Born under an unlucky star, that's me. On this bright and beautiful summer morning I stopped by a gas station on my way to work to pick up some breakfast. I get out of the car with it running and somehow, and don't ask because I have no idea how, the doors locked behind me. I come back out and the keys are locked inside the car.

Iceland sadly has a very low crime rate, so it's not like I could wait for the next black guy to come along who just HAPPENED to be carrying a Slim Jim. And the police won't help you either anymore, because a man has decided to make a "career" out of this. Bless him. Little angel of mercy riding around in his Toyota. While someone is accepting money for a service they provide, the police are not allowed to step in and do it for free. Which makes sense. Only this guy is an absolute miser of the worst kind and his damn help costs you 50 dollars. He takes his own sweet time in getting there, spends thirty seconds popping open the car door and this costs, and I repeat, 50 motherloving dollars. Grab your ankles people, this is gonna be a good one!

While waiting for Gabriel to arrive on the scene however, I was privy to witnessing a young man I am semi-familiar with show up at the gas station, come stomping out of his car wearing Mr. Cool Man sunglasses, fill up the car and come in to pay only to have his card rejected. He made a big scene and patronizingly started telling the lady cashier to loan him the money. He didn't even try to be nice to inspire some element of sympathy. He just wanted to intimidate her with his awesomeness into giving him all the gas. Alas, no such luck for our Billy Idol today.  Then he goes "gimme back my card", and she refused and he stomped out of the station and tried to get the guy at the pumps to spot him for the cash. He didn't think so either. Anyway, to make a long story short-esque someone shows up with money to loan the douchehole so he... and I have to say I chuckled at this point...comes hauling ass in the car up to the door, screeching tires and all, throws the money in through the front door and screamed something like "Bite your pussy, you disgusting bitch" and raced off.  Awww. Isn't that charming? I just wanted to share this little story with you people because I wanted it to touch your hearts and inspire you the way that it has me.  I'm a changed person now. The next time I go to a gas station, that will be my method of payment. I was so impressed with his confidence and maturity, I'm absolutely determined to wear huge shiny sunglasses and throw money everywhere and tell the employees to go bite their genitalia. Then I too can be kewl like a muffugga, woot wooooot....

In all actuality, I'm trying to kill some time until I get off work. I swear it must be in my job description that I'm supposed to be roofing the building or painting the outside of the house and I just ahve no idea, because 9 hours a day here don't make a lick of sense. Not that I'm complaining but I get a little worried sometimes that I must be forgetting something.

Time of the mormon joke of the day.

A Mormon bishop and a protestant minister are talking theology one day. The minister turns to the bishop and says "I know why you Mormons finally gave up polygamy." Intrigued, the Mormon bishop replies "Oh, why is that?" "Because," replies the minister, "you finally understood Jesus' teaching that no man can serve two masters."